Why I Relate to Aly & Aj’s “Rush” More at 23 Than 9

As a person, and as a writer, I’ve experienced a significant amount of growth this year. 2020 kicked everyone’s butt in one way or another, but for me, my faith grew stronger, my writer’s voice developed even more, and I’ve never been happier. You can read more about that HERE.

But seriously, if you grew up watching Disney Channel like I did in the 2000s, you’ll know Ally & Aj. They were special, the two sisters with undeniable talent and what I know now are total punk-rock influences. A recent grazing session on YouTube reminded me what a totally banger this song is. Between the beautiful, haunting vocal harmonies, and the insightful lyrics, this has everything.

“I’m convinced these songs were written not as much to bop to as kids, but to return to when you’re older to empathize with the lyrics and let the message warm your soul.”

Commenter on YouTube

So I thought that for you, my lovely blog readers, I’d take a little deep dive into what this song means for me in concert with my favorite lyrics. When I was nine, I knew it as one of the songs that would play in between commercials while I was watching some of my favorite sitcoms. Or maybe I knew it off of the Twitches soundtrack. Regardless, it means a lot more to me now than it ever did before. Aly & Aj were special – they seemed like old souls on a kid’s channel, and I’m so glad to see that they’re still doing the music thing even all these years later (I seriously LOL’d at their 2020 explicit version of “Potential Breakup Song”).

Into your head, into your mind
Out of your soul, race through your veins
You can’t escape, you can’t escape

It’s an overthinking anthem! I don’t think I felt quite this stressed when I was nine years old. I mean, I did deal with some difficult life things, but overall, I was relatively relaxed aside from those particular struggles. Now at twenty-three, I’m trying to build a life for myself and breathe new meaning into the profession and hobbies I’ve chosen for myself.

Don’t let nobody tell you your life is over
Be every color that you are
Into the rush now, you don’t have to know how
Know it all before you try

This is my anthem for 2021 and forward. I’m so done with the haters, and letting snotty, irritating people steal my joy. I’m done feeling like an imposter, and mindlessly digesting whatever crap people throw at me. Instead, I’m going to be my neon-pink, sparkly self and carefully steer myself into my own success. My bright pink hair brings me so much joy, so I’m going to keep it that way as long as I still like it. I even finally pierced my nose this past fall, which I’d been wanting to do since literally high school. More than ever, my joy is up to me, and I’m not tolerating fake people (or fake cheese). Life is far too short for that, after all.

I also love this idea of taking that risk in life, whatever it may be, even without knowing how it’s going to turn out. That’s what they’re talking about here – the rush. You have to go for your dreams, and make them happen. Vibrate at a higher frequency, look beyond your struggles, and break through the walls that others try to build around you.

It takes you to another place
Imagine everything you can
All the colors start to blend
Your system overloads again
Can you feel it?

It’s a constant battle to choose joy and peace. Something my holistic nutritionist told me that really resonated was that you gotta avoid unconscious reaction, and choose conscious action instead. Happiness is a choice – and yeah, crap still happens, and you might still get stressed, but you can’t stay there. You pick yourself up, and you keep fighting. Giving up is accepting defeat, and your future self will thank you for keeping at it.

If you’re like me, and you’re fascinated with time travel and all the theoretical ramifications of time, space, and energy, then you might like my latest book. It’s about me going back in time to see my younger self in the name of seeking justice for old bullies that got away with way too much crap. You can find the book HERE.

Thank you for being here, and reading this far if you did. I’m so excited for what 2021 holds. Remember, be you, and be unapologetically bold. This world needs what you have to offer.

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Where Creativity Meets Grief: Managing Emotions in the Wake of Loss

Hello friends,

As you may have already known from my social media posts, I lost my grandfather about a week ago. His funeral was yesterday, and I’m still feeling super numb honestly. This isn’t the first time I’ve lost a family member, but it’s the first time I lost someone who I was really close to. My Nono was my prayer buddy, biggest supporter, and best friend. I loved him with all my heart, and I noticed that he was often there for me in ways that even my parents couldn’t fully be.

Nono proudly in front of his “jewelry shop” of fruit that boosted sales significantly in his store!

We had music in common – as an accomplished musician who plays guitar, bass, and mandolin (which he had gifted to me a few months ago while he was still around), he would always chat about that stuff. He’d always tell me “never stop, honey” and “you’ll be just fine, Sweetie”. A big ol’ softy with a gruff exterior, my Nono was truly special, and will be so missed. He touched so many lives, and at the service yesterday, I was absolutely dumbfounded by the amount of people who showed up from his the grocery store where he worked in the produce department part time. They all adored him – friends, neighbors, even his boss loved him so much. Needless to say, she was in tears a bit too, so I reached out to her encouraging her to stay in touch with our family, as she had known Nono for so long.

We even had a really nice reception afterwards, and it was so nice to get to chat with family and friends some more. And I recruited my cousins from the other side of the family to play some songs for him (specifically, I got to choose “Words I Would Say” by Sidewalk Prophets, which I highly recommend you listen to HERE – it’s all the things that my Nono would always say to me, so I dedicated it to him at his funeral: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8t9u-LOa3OI)

This was the view from the reception venue – a super nice country club in a fancy outdoor tent. The Boston skyline was visible, and my mom put cute little cardinals in the centerpieces because they were Nono’s favorite bird.

I was telling my mom that it would be cool to go to his work and chat with people some more, and maybe even the coffee shop where he frequented for breakfast every morning. In the wake of loss, I think it’s so important to feel closer to that person by thinking about and doing the things they loved.

So now, I gotta take the time to grieve, but I’m also itching to get back into my writing groove (which I did, shortly before he passed very suddenly). It’s that balance that’s so weird, because I feel this gaping hole in my life now, but I haven’t cried a lot about it. I don’t feel obligated to cry, of course, but I do really want to get it out of my system somehow. But I also don’t want to forget him. Somehow, I gotta carry my Nono with me as I live the rest of my life without him. And that’s the trickiest part, in so many ways.

Do me (and yourself) a favor, and hug your loved ones please. No one knows how long they have in this life. I know for a fact that my Nono is with Jesus now, because he believed on Him as his Savior and accepted His free gift of salvation (John 3:16), but it’s still really sad. I’m trying to rejoice that he’s with my Mére (grandmother) now, but I really will miss him so much.

A recent picture of me and Nono ❤

Thank you for reading this long, drawn-out post. I’m going to try to resume the fun novel content soon, but wanted to update you on why I’ve been a bit quiet more recently.

In the meantime, why not check out my existing books on Amazon? Hopefully those can tide you over until I create new content. Thank you for being here, and for supporting me always ❤

My Amazon link: https://www.amazon.com/Angelina-Singer/e/B0743ZF23N/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_ebooks_1

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